Evan Rachel Wood as a Manipulator (Part 4 of 4)



Cognitive dissonance is how a pro-lifer kills an abortion doctor. It’s how a person who hits you one second can claim to love you the next. It’s why battered women can’t leave. It’s why we ignore God killing David’s son to prove a point, because certain ideas fit our narrative and when those ideas are challenged instead of facing the problem, admitting we are wrong, or seeing the hypocrisy, we get defensive, we get angry, we stop listening, because we are afraid—afraid to be alone, with no meaning, no purpose, no comfort. If we are afraid to face each other, we are afraid to face ourselves.

Without the awareness that however strongly you harbor the opinion you are right about something, someone else feels just as strongly that you are wrong, and it isn’t necessarily because they are stupid or a bad person, it’s because their narrative is completely different than yours and that isn’t their fault. We won’t understand these ideas until we learn the other narrative, so we can deconstruct it instead of generalizing it, getting our pitchforks or tiki torches. What if we really started to listen to one another by asking the right questions instead of yelling the right answers?

We must stop punishing people for being wrong. I know this is hard. When I was being abused, I was not myself. I was angry, I was reckless, I had given up on my well-being and the world, so nothing mattered to me anymore, except my new dysfunctional family I had adopted, the all-American rejects.

I never harmed anyone, but I was brainwashed into turning a blind eye to the horrors being done around and to me. I learned to be compliant for survival.

Violence, abuse, and oppression run rampant in the past of angry violent people.

Remember this when you are calling a Trump supporter a fucking idiot and punishing them for being lost.

That’s what they are. They are lost. When a child does something bad or wrong, do you make them feel like a fucking idiot for it? Or do you try to guide them in the right direction? Do you get them help? Are you patient? Do you listen?

Somewhere along the way, we were made to believe that if you make someone feel guilty and stupid enough, they will change their ways.

It’s a tactic used on children very often.

We turn our backs and fume and sulk, shunning the perpetrator, punishing them.

We have all been raised on a system of punishment and reward, so, of course, it would seem to be what’s right, to scold and shame. Make people see the hurt they are causing by scaring them straight, making them feel unloved, stupid, and invisible.

We all are guilty of these tactics. So often our feelings do not match our behavior.

We don’t know how to engage, so we stop engaging.

When people tried to make me feel dumb for being lost and angry, it only made me push back even harder, and it reinforced the lies my abuser told me. It was the people who didn’t judge my awful behavior, but saw the hurt, scared girl, under it, that really made a difference in my life.

I am not saying to excuse horrible behavior or violence, but I am asking you to understand it.

Understand that these people who have different ideas than you may not be violent now, but if you keep calling them stupid, or making fun of their bad hair, small hands, or funny accents, then you are just as bad as they are. You have become the bully you hate and you have also fueled the fire of violence.

You have to practice what you preach. Being smug, holier than thou, or a dick because you rest on a bed of facts, does not make you part of the solution. You are making it easier for these people to forsake reason.

Try compassion. Try keeping the focus on the "real" issues and not fight back with the same closed-mindedness and venom.

The reason I keep making connections between my experiences with abuse and people you don’t understand is because after the years of work I have had to do on myself to see my situation objectively, being horrified at my own reflection, and working to change it, I can’t help but draw comparisons to the world and its behavior today.

When I zoom out, I see that everyone is traumatized. The problems that divide us are simply reactions, and coping mechanisms, for the emotional torment everyone who walks the earth feels in one way or another. What we have to remember is they are symptoms of the same problem, they are only realized in different forms.

One person’s heroin addiction may be another person’s white supremacy, one person’s gestures of grandiose and narcissism may be another person’s domestic violence. One person’s school shooting is another person’s masterpiece of art. One working woman’s fight for equality in the workplace is a stay-at-home mother’s fight to raise good children and shape the future in a healthy way for all of us.

If we could take a step down off of our moral high horses for a moment and listen to each other, we can look deeply into someone and their situation to find out where these ideas and beliefs come from and why. When you ask the right questions, you realize the "why" is sometimes more important than the "do."

The "why's" are what connect us, so ask questions of your "enemy."

Statistically, the most known reason as to why couples get divorced is poor communication.

Two people that entered an agreement promising to work together to nurture this thing called a marriage, give up more often than not because we simply do not know how to express ourselves in a way that will be received. We cannot escape our own egos long enough to find a common ground.

Even if a couple decides not to stay together, you may be able to eliminate so much resentment by asking your wife why she cheated on you rather than kicking her to the curb for having pretended to love you. We could ask what she was feeling, what she thought she could get out of it, if she was happy, if she was in love, and go from there.

We can’t be mad at the way someone feels because we can’t control all of our feelings, but we can repair if we listen. If we try not to find where that piece of skin is exposed under the armor, not to find a vulnerable place to attack and discredit an experience because accepting it would feel too much like taking away our right to be angry.

We don’t want to be walked all over, but there is a way to be angry and understanding, to honor your feelings while accepting others. You can still be angry and hurt, but understand why someone hurt you.

We can walk away feeling the pain, the emotional betrayal of our own minds when we accept that the picture of how we thought things were supposed to be is not the reality and we must let go of the picture, let go of the false prophet, let go of our savior.

We must free fall and hold onto ourselves while surrendering to the unknown.

We must admit where we are a part of the problem before we rip each other apart.

We have to learn to learn from each other.


What is Evan telling us in this summary? In one sentence she is basically comparing Trump supporters to how she was when she was being abused by Manson. Because she felt what it was like to be abused by Manson, she understands what Trump supporters are feeling now. And just like she figured out a way to escape her abuse, she has it all figured out how to get people away from their abuser - President Donald Trump - and align with her experienced and evolved way of thinking. Evan assures us, despite how evil we may think Trump's supporters are, that they are not evil, just like she was not evil for going along with Manson's ways. When she was with Manson, she was not herself, just like Trump's supporters are not themselves. And just like it was not Evan's fault for being the victim of Manson's abuse, it is not the fault of Trump's supporters for supporting him. Just like Evan was brainwashed, they are brainwashed. Do not call them dumb, because when Evan was called dumb for sticking with Manson, if reinforced her to stay more with Manson, so if you call a Trump supporter dumb, then it will just reinforce them to support Trump even more. Don't make them feel stupid or guilty, because this won't change them, like it didn't change Evan when she was made to feel that way when she was with Manson. Even though you may present facts to the Trump supporters, you still cannot be smug about it and be arrogant about it, because when people were giving Evan the facts about Manson she did not believe them if they were arrogant and smug. If they had only stepped off their moral high horses, Evan may have listened, so also if we who possess facts step off our moral high horses then maybe a Trump supporter will listen. We must communicate better, admit we who are right also can be part of the problem, and we have to learn from each other.

If you think that this year has made me angrier, know that actually, the opposite is true. I have let go of so much anger toward other people and their beliefs, but it actually started with admitting to myself that I was a part of the problem. It started with me asking myself the same questions I was trying to corner people with.

You see, I fell into the trap so many of us do. I got lazy because I had facts on my side. I never followed up with research, I never thought of new ideas, I resigned almost immediately to a voice that told me, I wasn’t smart enough to fix these gigantic problems which were so out of my realm of understanding. The facts were so obvious to me, there was no way I could ever say anything that people hadn’t already thought of or heard, nothing I had to say would ever make a dent in society, surely, I could never hold my own.

This is where we all do ourselves and each other a disservice.

After a year of torment and digging into the center of myself, to find some silver lining to all of this madness, division, and unfair fighting, I managed to uncover a pearl in the darkness.

One beacon of hope I found, was that whether or not you agree with someone’s opinions, the fact that they are angry, triggered, and ready to fight, means they care. I know it seems crazy to think that someone who doesn’t want queer parents to adopt, or who wants all abortion to be legal, cares.

In the eyes of some, when a person inflicts suffering because of their seemingly unreasonable beliefs, it must mean they hate the presumed victim.

We assume this because we cannot step outside of ourselves. It’s hard when you feel so fucking right, and sometimes even when you very much are, to step down and have the conversation without getting so upset, without wanting to take out all of your frustrations about the world at large onto this other human who disagrees with you.

But it isn’t just your frustrations about the world or this human which makes you incapable of communicating, it is also your frustrations about yourself, your powerlessness, and your inability to feel heard? We want so badly to be heard, but we don’t make the effort to figure out how, and more often than not we are silenced.

We are so angry about being invisible, we shout so loudly, and we don’t wait for a reply. We just want to say the "truth" and walk away, leaving the other with their decision, leaving the other with no context, no feelings, no compromises, no confessions.

We need a big shift of consciousness, and from what I can see right now, we are in the middle of a much-needed growing pain.

People are starting to face the truth, and admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery.


Evan isn't an angrier now that Trump is President. She realized she was part of the problem. She needed to look back into her past, recall the abuse Manson did to her, and use that to build a platform of comparing herself while in an abusive relationship with Manson with half of America being in an abusive relationship with Trump by supporting him. Evan got lazy, even though she had all the facts. Her empathy kicked in and was able to make the connection between herself who held all the facts and Trump supporters who believed all the lies of their abuser, Donald Trump. For Evan, it is "hard when you feel so fucking right" and to have to communicate with a bunch of dim wits like those backward Trump supporters is difficult, but she has found the key, she has recovered, she has shifted her consciousness, and is now able to communicate with Trump supporters because she was once like them when she was in an abusive relationship with Marilyn Manson.

Right now, I do not want to be writing this article. I want this all to go away. I want to live in peace and without fear. The intense worry I have for my child and his future accompanied by the sudden Sarah Conner urges I am having about raising him are very real and again almost comical. Sometimes I believe the only thing getting me through this, is my ability to laugh at the absurdity of our situation. That doesn’t mean I don’t take it seriously. In fact, if this year has given me any gift, it was a good hard kick in the ass.

I genuinely thought that by just having good opinions I was making a difference. I was spreading the word, and that was enough. I was naive, and I was also lying to myself.

However, I was completely unaware of this fact at the time.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why our own minds are sometimes our worst enemies.

I get involved now, I don’t wait for other people to do it for me. I join groups, I speak out, I speak to lawmakers, I open my doors to people, and I admit when I am wrong so I can learn. I have changed so much in this past year. The gloves are off.

When that little voice in my head says,“It would take a miracle to change things, what’s the point?” Another little voice speaks, a new voice, my true voice, and it says, “Why not me?”

I continue to fight and feel. To stay strong but to allow myself moments of grief.

I have no other choice, for apathy will be the true death of us all.


Evan is now finally "awake", she has to be for the sake of her child's future, and like Sarah Conner in Terminator she is pumped up and ready to fight the good fight. It was not enough what she did in the past. By coming out publicly about her rape she is connecting with all those people that are so wrong about America. When she was with Manson, everything about her was likewise wrong, but now she is ready to share her experience with the Trump world and by doing this help to transform America into her image and likeness.

Here ends Evan's article. If you don't get that this was a bunch of manipulative bullshit to build her own political platform as an activist, then you don't get anything about her. How much of this she really has come to believe, even though it is a complete distortion of the truth, is hard to tell, but when you are dealing with a woman with as many mental illnesses as Evan Rachel Wood, in vain are you dealing with this situation rationally. To do so will only drive you crazy, because rationality plays no part in this for Evan Rachel Wood.